Have you ever known a friend to be irrationally obsessed with their Myers-Brigs personality type, or their horoscope, or their Taoist element?
They do this because they do not know themselves. The hallmark of someone who has no self-concept is the perpetual quest for definition. When asked, “Who are you?”, their mind draws a blank. It stops to process what they truly are, and when they come to know answer, they achieve an existential crisis. “Who am I? I don’t know. What if I’m… nothing?”
The answer to the question of “self” has been mulled over by a great many philosophers for thousands of years, and psychologists for hundreds. Most people come to a sense of self that gets them through the day, finding themselves in their accomplishments, experiences, and abilities.
“I am a photographer because it is my job. I am a runner because it is my hobby. I’m a musician because I like music.” While these are still outside definitions, they can at least tell us a little about our deep, inner selves: I am the kind of person who has an artistic mind because of my interest in photography. I am the kind of person who values heath, and body, and life, because of my interest in running. I am the kind of person who is intuitive, feeling and creative because of my passion for music. These outside concepts delve into who we are and give us brief glimpses of the core. To the vast majority of people who do these things, self-concept is so miniscule to our waking consciousness that they simply carry on with their lives without a second thought. They simply are who they are.
But, there are people who have no self-concept because they have never done anything meaningful. The person who has survived a blizzard knows they are the kind of person that is capable of strength, endurance, combined with a powerful will to live. The ones who have not done such, and have never done anything similar, have no insight. So they reach out to find a definition from the mouths of gurus, the alignments of the stars, or the tests of psychologists, but all these are outside labels prescribed to us from another; they are not revelations from the inside-out.
This most recent generation of millennials are the worst of the bunch when it comes to a solid grasp of self-concept. They search for something that defines them, outside of their abilities and contributions, which amount to none.
It has gotten so bad that personality traits and horoscopes can’t provide the labels that these young people need. Now, they seek to create whole new genders that more resemble horoscopes than actual masculine, feminine, and miscellaneous behaviors. As you shall soon see, even this is not enough for them.
Read through some of these so-called “genders”, generated by the lovely ladies(?) and gentlemen(?) of tumblr. Let me know if you see a reoccurring theme.
I’m not done yet. Here are a few more that are worth a good laugh.
All finished? Got your chuckles out?
So what theme do you see in the vast majority of these genders?
- Aerogender – Gender that changes by environment.
- Agenderflux – Where one identifies as agender, except when they don’t [*shrug*].
- Amicagender – Gender that changes depending on who you’re with.
- Aquarigender – Gender that’s constantly changing.
- Cogitogender – A gender that exists only when you think about it.
- Contigender – A gender that constantly changes, only through space and time.
- Corugender – A gender that changes in flashbacks.
- Cosmicgender [my personal favorite] – A gender so vast and complex that you are only able to process it a small bit at a time.
- Virgender – “A gender identity that feels weakened by stress, to the point where one is nearly genderless.”
- Xumgender – “Never being satisfied with your gender due to constant self-doubt or identity issues, causing one to compulsively search and seek out something that fits as perfect as possible”
That last one hits closest to self-actualization that these people can get. If you haven’t guessed it, the theme is change, because they still can’t make up their fucking minds as to who they are. Of course nothing “feels” right, because nothing is right on the inside.
They perceive gender to be some kind of horoscope that they can change at will, but these people are so lacking in self-concept that even when they get the chance to create their own gender it becomes something so obtuse as to become meaningless and, in the end, defines nothing. A gender that changes based on… well… anything, is not a gender; it’s called mood, but they don’t know that. They’ll keep creating new genders and new stupid flags, and new disorders, and new otherkin, and new headmates if it somehow, in some way, gives them a clue as to “who they really are”. They’ll flock to anything if it eases their existential breakdown and next week it’ll change again as they “rediscover” themselves. For every step forward, they take one step back. They can change the label all they want and it won’t fix the ignorance within.
This is different than the person who looks at a horoscope and says, “Yeah, that seems like me,” or the person who turns to tarot cards for guidance in brief times of confusion. Truly, the tumblrinas are so lost that conventional definitions don’t work. Not even their own definitions work.
Self-concept is the single most important element in attaining true in self-confidence. It’s needed to judge our worth and to feel out our rightful place in this world. No one knows who we truly are when we enter this world, but we make our best guess by trying on different hats, working on our abilities, and seeking out various experiences which eventually, we hope, let us know who we are. The perpetual confusion of genderfluid tumblrinas is what happens when you keep a toddler in a crib until they’re 18 then kick them off to liberal arts college. At this rate, they will never achieve anything, experience a happy life, or feel the comfort of knowing their true selves. They will remain pathetic, neurotic pansies until they day they die, and history will forget an entire generation.